RP Grand Hall

James barely had time to mutter a joke about Sirius fetching the paper before his attention was captured.

J: Four?! Shit...

Sirius read on.

S: Far away from England though, I guess.

He turned the page.

J: Not that far from the Netherlands, though...

Sirius nodded grimly.

S: Well, its not all doom and gloom I suppose.

He looked at the other page.

S: The minister of the Goblin Defence League has been outed as 'just a really ugly dwarf'.

J: Grundelburg Gripe is a dwarf?! How do they explain the greenish tint to his skin?!

He read aloud.

S: Upon being asked about his emerald pallor, Gripe has admitted to 'rolling around a bit in nogtail dung'. His representatives have since added that this strange habit is what led to him acquiring the nickname 'Grundleburp', due to nogtail waste having it's distinctive eggy aroma.

He pursed his lips.

S: Always wondered about that.

James pursed his lips.

J: Hm. Well. That's that mystery sold. What's happening in the Quidditch?

Remus smiled softly, distantly, unengaged with the conversation.

Sirius flicked back a few pages and let out a low whistle.

S: South Hampshire Salamanders are very low in the league tables, but looks like Billius Krump is set to be fired anyway.

He pointed at a moving picture of a heavily bearded man slapping a skinner one round the face in what looked like a brothel.

James cringed heavily.

J: The Salamanders are know for their speed, Krump's one for power; he'll never thrive in that team, he needs someone like the Wadenhoe Wol-

He stopped short and made eye contact with Remus.

J: Wool merchants.

R: Wolves.

J: Ah. Yes. Perhaps you're right. Hm, can't remember, you know me and my Quidditch!

Sirius caught James' eye and mouthed 'wool merchants?'

He hurriedly went back to the paper and pointed again.

S: You're right though, he's not out of a job just yet.

He barked out a laugh.

S: Ha! As if the Ilkley Erklings are trying to get him, that's never going to happen.

(Erklings?)

James snorted unattractively, then fiddling with a curl and gave Lily a smouldering look, unaware of the bat he had hanging in the cave. Meanwhile, Remus was continuously looking over his shoulder for signs of his girlfriend... if she could still be called that?

Sirius noticed Remus looking distracted and tried to catch his attention by flashing another page in front of his face.

S: Hey, look at the concepts for the new Clean Sweep.

(I've always heard about the Erl King I got confused sorry)

Remus blinked rapidly.

R: Hm? Yeah, yeah...

James cleared his throat awkwardly, trying to think of what Remus liked. Cardigans, Amy, people not knowing he was a werewolf...

J: We could do a crossword?

S: I hate crosswords.

He looked at his friends.

S: I love crosswords.

Remus banged his cup down and stood up.

R: I have to go and find her.

James was momentarily stunned by the force with which Remus stood, and to be honest he was a little scared by it.

J: Remus no, she needs t-

R: She needs to talk to me.

And with that he was gone.

Amy stumbled into the room, looking scared and uncomfortable.

S: For Merlin's sake, Amy.

J: You just missed him, go go go! He was so quick he apparated or some shit!

Evangeline sighed and rolled her eyes.

E: One can't apparate within the grounds of Hogwarts, leeghoofd.

Sirius watched as Amy ran from the hall.

S: Sit down?

He gestured to the empty seat next to him.

Evangeline looked down her nose at the space beside him, and instead chose the seat beside James, shuffling between he and Lily.

(where did remmy go)

Sirius rolled his eyes. He was always the villain, she was insufferable. Must be her 'witching week'.

L: Hi!

Lily grinned, hoping James would use the distraction to clear his nose.

(WITCHING WEEK I SCREAMED)

Evangeline turned a beaming smile on Lily.

E: Hello Lily! How's your head, after last night?

L: I'm fine actually, I think I'm over the worst of it. Had to perform more than one clearing charm to stop the common room spinning.

Evangeline laughed daintily.

E: Poor you - thank goodness for Lillibet's Lightening Serum, it looked like I had two black eyes this morning!

James looked at Sirius as if to say 'women, huh?'

Sirius looked back as if to say 'I want to not exist thx'

L: Yea...

Her sentence ran off as she looked at Sirius.

L: Sirius why do you look like you've been given bad news?

Evangeline turned very suddenly, her hair flipping out behind her, and perched her chin on her fist. The way she leant in said 'tell me more', while her expression, tight lips and dramatically raised eyebrows, said 'droogkloot' (Dutch for 'boring fuck').

E: Yes, Sirius, tell us more about why you have a face like a kicked puppy.